An interesting discussion to have. Like you, I've also become more interested in analyzing the scene a bit more in-depth than just my experiences have given me (which is over 9 years combined between singular experiences and those with my current partner). This, for a number of reasons - not least, that this is the first time with my current partner that I made being in the community a non-negotiable as part of our relationship (though what that looked like was negotiable). My experiences in the community meant that I wanted to continue to participate in activities and to meet some of the amazing people I've been fortunate to have met on here that I simply wouldn't have crossed paths with if not for this community. And had some of the most fun and sexy experiences of my life too, hands down! I'm currently a full-time student, and have had the opportunity to explore aspects of the community with more detail and resources than I've had access to before through class projects/ essays. This has led me to discover more about the wider community in ways that have been pretty interesting: for instance, people in CNM (consensually non-monogamous) relationships - that swinging technically falls under the umbrella of - have higher rates of happiness within their relationships compared to those in monogamous situations. This wasn't exactly a surprise finding to me though, as communication in swinging relationships has to be extremely good, open, and honest if it's going to work long or short-term. Findings through literature also pointed to there being - still - very high levels of concern among people at their identity being revealed to even close friends and workmates (generally), as it was understood this could jeopardize their social standings and even job security. This was even within so-called 'supportive' and 'open minded' workplaces like a Uni in NZ (where that some of that information had been gathered from), where it might be expected that these were very liberal and diverse workplaces. The lack of information from the outside as to the working reality of the community is limited, at best, and mis-informed and frankly inaccurate at worst. I do believe that if the wider public had better education on the reality of the scene and what is involved (and the levels of involvement that can exist - it's not all gangbangs and orgies... far from it in my experiences), as well as understanding the core requirements of the community around consent, safe sex expectations, and people appreciating all shapes, sizes, ethnicities (generally) and sexualities... like, there's a lot to love about the community and how it operates. Sadly, the reality of changing the social narrative around sexually 'diverse' relationship arrangements has a hell of a long way to go before that's 'normalized' for much of society... perhaps that may never happen. But, just as suicide was once a totally subject, the conversation is now fortunately much more acceptable and readily had. Can that happen for swinging? I'm not sure. I suspect not.... the ingrained mononormative culture and expectation from religion in most Western societies means that's unlikely to change any time soon. My 2c worth (ok, maybe a little more like $2 worth lol!)
