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What Are Your Expectations?

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As a rule,we move at the speed of the least experienced couple and we always state that upfront. Sometimes we just meet for drinks then organise playtime away from that,but we have also done both in the same evening as long as it is fully discussed in advance. Both couples should also be prepared to discuss what their boundaries are for activity as well as any likes or dislikes. Our preference is to warm our partner up before initiating anything with the other couple,a straight swap with no preliminaries is a bit weird as we like to be able to touch each other during proceedings. I guess the biggest thing we have learned is that even if things seem to be going well, good conversation etc,it may still not work. We have had plenty of meetings with couples and on the surface they seem very keen then we never hear from them again. We all have to realise that we all have different motivations for swinging and for whatever reason they decided not to take it further. Learning to not take rejection personally is a very useful asset smile
Warming the Bed
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Interesting questions, it will be interesting to see what others have to say but here goes We have only had one encounter with another couple and a lot was discussed between the two ladies prior to the meet. This led to high expectations of what was to happen, unfortunately it didn't turn out as planned. It was still a very fun, enjoyable night, but it didn't go as far as expected. Next time it will be taken as it comes (pun intended) Our guidelines are simple, safe sex and if any one is uncomfortable with what is going on speak up and everyone stops. We are willing to do most things including full swap but will be keeping all activities to the same room. We should add that we are not just here for sex, We are looking for friends with benefits who we can see for non bedroom activities as well. We also have children so it can take time to set up a play date, so we what to make it worth it.
Warming the Bed
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Our exectations are nothing more than that. Just meeting for drinks or a coffee, nothing more, nothing less. You cant get to know people from behind a keyboard. We never agree to a play date before we have met in person. While still at the meeting we may offer a play date to some, to most we wont. We normally discuss this in private together before deciding, so the decision is later. We agree with above, you must get used to rejection and not take it personally. We never give a reason for saying no thanks, and we dont want to know the reason from others for a no thanks. Knowing the true reason for being rejected could make things awkward in the future if/when paths cross. But the main reason for not giving giving or wanting a reason is this: Times, people, crtieria, choices, situations, experience, choices, reasoning.......it all changes and develops. A number of those who were "no thanks" are now good friends and playmates. The chances are we would not be if we (or them) had known of the reason for rjection at the time.
Warming the Bed
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One of the hardest things was/is not to ask for a reason for a rejection. We all internally want to know, but really, it is best not too.
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^^^ Agreed,I don't think it's that helpful to know why a couple doesn't want to play with us. Alot of it might come down to how they look and it would be unwise to say "you're too fat" or "we don't like you". We've certainly had a few weird ones,ones that appear keen then disappear into the wilderness but it's best not to pursue them because they've obviously changed their minds. Part of the benefit of this board is that you learn who the cautious/indecisive ones are fairly quickly and can move on!
Forum Virgin
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Hi maybe a little late to start exploring, but would appreciate a 'helping hand' as I gain experience and skills.

D plato